With little actual football to report on during the international break, sports news sites are forgiven for latching on to all sorts of tenuous transfer rumours in order to boost popularity.
Metro.co.uk, however, tend to abuse that privilege.
Going by the daily freesheets’ interweb pages, anybody would think the transfer window was open all year round. Here are a few of their best Arsenal and Spurs efforts over the past 36 hours:
Arsene Wenger ‘orders Arsenal to seal Yannick Ferreira Carrasco transfer’
A real doozy of a 2 + 2 = 5 link to start us off, with the guy who scored the last goal in Monaco’s recent 3-1 win at the Emirates reportedly on his way there.
“Having seen the winger personally during the two ties between the clubs, boss Arsene Wenger has requested the signing of the Belgian Under-21 international.”
Does anybody really believe that this is how scouting works? And doesn’t a ‘tie’ refer to the entire Champions League round-of-16 clash, as opposed to denoting each individual match? The mind boggles.
Arsenal ‘making HUGE transfer bid to seal signing of majestic star’
HUGE you say? The player in question, Inter midfielder Mateo Kovacic, must be going for what’s often referred to as ‘Bale money’ these days. At the very least, Arsenal must be preparing to top the £42.5m they paid Real Madrid for Mesut Ozil, right?
“He is rated at about £17.7million.”
Arsenal ‘using Alexis Sanchez to help them seal Charles Aranguiz transfer’
Presumably the Metro fell asleep sometime around mid-January and have just woken up if they believe ‘Sanchez has settled seamlessly into life at the Emirates.’
The Chilean has scored once in his last 12 all-competition games with the Gunners and hasn’t laid on an assist in his past five Premier League appearances.
Still, Sanchez’s skills in negotiation will clearly be vital in enticing Internacional midfielder Aranguiz, also Chilean, to north London this summer. Or Arsenal could just offer enough money.
Tottenham ‘ready to sign two La Liga stars in STUNNING transfer swoop’
What’s with all the inverted commas? Who’s supposed to have said all this?
Anyway, this one has been galloping around the gossip columns since Spurs reportedly sent a scout to watch Valencia thrash Elche 4-0 away over the weekend.
Former Everton utility back Shkodran Mustafi and Algerian international forward Sofiane Feghouli are thought to be the objects of the Lilywhites’ desire.
Tottenham and Southampton battle for Palermo midfielder Franco Vazquez
The lack of inverted commas is a real worry when rating the veracity of this rumour.
Vazquez has bagged an impressive haul of seven goals and nine assists in La Liga this season. If he’s any good, no doubt he’ll go somewhere better than Spurs or Southampton.