Since Costa Rica’s smiting of Italy nailed the lid shut on the coffin containing England’s World Cup dreams, the Roy Hodgson naysayers have joined forces to belt out a chorus containing the names of the managers that could’ve outperformed the Croydon commandant in Brazil.
Lyrically, it leaves a lot to be desired, with individuals as uninspiring as Harry Redknapp, Alan Pardew and Gareth Southgate all featuring.
The latest to be shoehorned in is Hull City boss Steve Bruce, who has taken a place amongst the managerial elite after getting a string of sides promoted to the Premier League and vanquishing mighty foes of Sheffield United, Southend and Middlesbrough’s ilk in guiding the Tigers to the FA Cup final.
As if acknowledging that such a vast expanse of barely commendable achievements puts him in the England gaffer reckoning is nothing short of ridiculous, Bruce is quoted in the Sun as saying:
“If in around six-eight years there’s an opportunity to work with the England squad, I would feel very honoured.”
Sustained top-flight survival and one unexpected cup final appearance may have landed Hodgson the job, but to suggest Bruce is a better bet with an inferior CV seems somewhat absurd.
Here are few more outrageous claims from run-before-they-can-walk bosses to mull over:
“I’m not suited to Bolton or Blackburn,” said the heavyset supremo, “I would be more suited to Inter or Real Madrid.”
“It wouldn’t be a problem to me to go and manage those clubs because I would win the double or the league every time.”
Interesting angle, Sam, but if the West Ham fans have had it with your kick-long-first-ask-questions-
After finishing in a very impressive eighth-place with Fulham in 2010/11, Welshman Hughes bizarrely decided to call it quits at Craven Cottage, stating:
“As a young, ambitious manager I wish to move on to further my experiences.”
The club that could help him realise said ambitions (by which he meant ‘give me lots of money to spend’) was QPR, who sacked him after ten months in charge.
He left the Super Hoops rooted to the foot of the Premier League and never got above Fulham in the table during his tenure.
Winner of one Capital One Cup and introducer of Michu to the Premier League, the Danish coach clearly has the credentials to land that job at a ‘big club’ he’s hankering for:
“I’ve tried smaller clubs in two major leagues…so I see no reason to repeat it.”
No, you’re right, that would be a waste of time Mike; three underwhelming stints in Spain and England is the path most commonly traced by coaches on their way to the world’s elite.