It’s long been agreed that Pele’s powers as an orator and commentator fall well short of his abilities as a footballer and he’s been up to usual tricks ahead of the 2014 World Cup in Brazil.
In conversation with Gary Lineker, the man his mates call Edson Arantes do Nascimento let slip the startling revelation: “”Neymar is young…It is a heavy pressure for him to get all the responsibility.”
Lucky the BBC opted to interview Pele over Michael Ricketts for that nugget…
Neymar is 9/1 second-favourite for the Golden Boot behind Lionel Messi and well worth backing to thrive given the reliability of the great man’s previous predictions.
Here’s a selection of the kind of observations that led Romario to observe: ““When he is silent, Pele is a poet.”
Condemning Brazil to a Group Stage exit in 2002
The Selecao went on to lift the trophy with victory over Germany in the final.
Failing to condemn the deaths of World Cup Stadium building workers
Pele was surprisingly blasé after the eighth construction worker death, saying: “this is normal, these things happen in life. These were just an accident, nothing to get worried about.”
France and Argentina will fight out the 2002 World Cup final
As has already been revealed, 2002 was the year it was revealed that Pele and Nostradamus were not, in fact, the same person, with both his would be finalists eliminated in the group stage.
Dubbing Nii Lamptey ‘The New Pele’
Lamptey had just starred for Ghana in the Under-17 World Cup in 1991 when the millstone moniker was bestowed.
His career began to nosedive almost immediately after a high-profile move to Europe, with ‘dark forces’ and spiritualist curses apportioned some of the blame.
Downplaying Dani Alves’ racial abuse
In the wake of the Barcelona star’s shocking treatment against Villarreal, Brazil’s leading scorer opted for an almost Sepp Blatter-esque lack of condemnation opining:
“We cannot allow ourselves to be affected by such a banal thing as someone throwing a banana”.
Anointing Spain ‘favourites’ for the 1998 World Cup
Much like your dad’s dress sense, followers of Edson’s wisdom have since come to wonder whether he may simply have been massively ahead of the curve on this one, as opposed to completely oblivious of the zeitgeist.
Hailing Nicky Butt as the best player at the South Korea/Japan tournament
“The player I like is Butt. He’s been the best player up to this point. He’s a tremendous midfielder. He’s a good marker, he’s passionate, he gets forward and he passes well.”
Pele over-egged the pudding to the extent that even the former Manchester United man subsequently suggested he was “talking crap.”