Now folks, did anybody listen to Danny Baker’s farewell appearance on BBC Radio London last week? I did. I do infrequently listen to the show. I’ve got a lot of time for Danny, considering my childhood was poxed by being sent to my bedroom to watch ‘Own Goals and Gaffes’ while Mum and Dad ‘talked.’
There’s been plenty of sympathy towards Dan the man for the way he was axed from the Beeb and in typically robust style, Baker himself took to the airwaves to have a yarn about being chopped. It all made for decent enough radio, especially considering he went down with all the dignity and poise of Tony Montana surrendering his mansion.
But despite my love for the man, I felt Danny Baker was being pretty bloody shortsighted. He seemed openly bitter about his termination, but at least he’s looking through the other end of the telescope in journalism terms and maybe he has lost his sense of perspective.
The public outcry since it was announced the show would be dropped has done nothing if not add a few quid to his next fee. It’s not like the bloke will be short of offers, is it? It’s not like he’s a struggling hack, desperately trying to make ends meet by polishing the editor’s golf clubs in a local newspaper sweatshop or worse, mercilessly trying to make a name for himself through a puerile betting challenge.
Do some people have no shame?
In all honesty, I’m only jealous of dear old Dan and in many respects, I am genuinely looking forward to the day when the bwin bosses feel the need to get on the phone to relieve me of my services due to a cost-cutting exercise.
Fearing that day not long off – and probably rapidly approaching – I thought it’d be in my best interest to cast the first stone by taking ten grand off bwin for the expenditure of a tenner and at the time of writing, it’s looking like a cunning plan.
It only seemed about a week or so ago when I jubilantly announced I’d passed the £100 mark, but nevertheless, today I jubilantly announce I’ve also passed the £200 mark.
Due to unforeseen legal circumstances, I was unable to submit my weekend tipple, so my last offering was a week ago for Chelsea and Manchester United’s Capital One Cup melee.
In hindsight, I would have staked my not inconsiderable family heirloom on there being over 1.5 goals in the game and after half an hour – with Comedy Dave Luiz running around to Benny Hill music and United fielding a pair of 12-year-old centre halves – I was deeply regretting not sticking the whole sum on there being over five goals on the night. As it was, I ‘only’ had £176.46 to put down and that kitty now safely resonates to the tune of £204.69.
So the £204.69 dollar question is what to do next? Well, £10 to £10k afficianados (hope you’re reading, Dave) will need no reminding that in weeks gone by for Champions League games, I’ve gone for over 1.5 goals in Real Madrid games and god knows why I didn’t go for that again last night with Borussia Dortmund in town.
Regardless, there’s always plenty of goals in Europe’s elite club competition and initially for bet 19 of the challenge I was looking towards Parkhead and Celtic’s valiant backs-to-the-wall-in-vain slaughtering by Barcelona.
You see, I’m a massive Lionel Messi fan. Greatest footballer to ever play the game, if you ask me, and I say that for a multitude of reasons – all of which I’m prepared to put forward. Anyhow, Little Lionel’s now had a little Lionel called Thiago and rumour has it that just a few hours after his birth, the tiny tot had already rounded three nurses and dinked one over the midwife.
Big Lionel’s a measly 1/5 to score at any time for Barca against Celtic and it’s 2/1 he follows it up with that daft baby-rocking celebration. If you think 1/5 is a bit lean, then he was 7/100 against Vallecano the other week and ended up getting two. That’s why you never meet a poor bookie.
As much as I’d love to stick my money on Messi scoring and as much as I reckon he will, I just can’t justify the punt at those odds when there are safer dabbles that will trouser me just as much, if not more.
After missing a trick with goals in Madrid v Dortmund I quite fancy the look of over 1.5 goals in Chelsea v Shakhtar at 1/5, but out of nowhere I found a little pearler that I just can’t tear myself away from.
Back in Glasgow, it’s just 9/25 that nasty Neil Lennon’s hoof-footed Hoops will pick up two or more yellow cards against Barcelona and my only worry is that a side who’ve recently been beaten by Kilmarnock and drawn with Dundee United won’t be able to get close enough to upend the visitors.
European nights in this part of Glasgow are usually hostile affairs and Celtic will need to get in among Barca’s ball-players if they’ve any chance of disrupting their flow. That should make for a few tackles going in and with a bit of luck, Dutch referee and supermarket manager Bjorn Kuipers will be serving a couple of cautions up to take me from £204.69 to £278.38.
Bet 19: Celtic to be shown over 1.5 yellow cards versus Barcelona @ 9/25
Current Balance: £204.69
Potential Balance: £278.38